Friday, November 2, 2007

It Was a Terrible, Horrible.....

...No Good, Very Bad Day! We've all had them. They're the kind of days that seem like if anything can go wrong, it does...to the extent that it's laughable. I did laugh, but mostly just cried. I'm writing about it this morning only because I don't want to forget the blessings a bad day can bring.

It all started on Thursday evening. When I got home from school, I was met with a horribly strong paint smell. The wood floor in the next apartment was being refinished or something like that. Anyway, within minutes, I had a headache so I decided I needed to leave. With really nowhere to go and no one to go with me, I went shopping for school stuff. That went well until it was time for dinner. I hate to eat alone, but decided to brave the food court. The tacos I ordered were the worst...yet I felt guilty for being ungrateful as there are children on the streets around the world, for sure here in Bangkok, who literally are starving, so I ate the them.

During the night, I got a phone call from Vanessa. She'd had a scary day trying to navigate a county hospital in order to get some test her Dr. had ordered...to be honest, my heart keeps breaking over and over. In the morning, I was lonely, had a headache and worst of all, had that fragile weepy feeling....I really wanted to stay home with the covers pulled over my head, but I'd promised a friend I'd give her a ride to school as she doesn't have a car and driver.So I got myself together and headed off for another day of preparation at school (I start my regular schedule of teaching on Tuesday).

Well, I ended up crying all the way to her house, tried to act as though nothing was wrong...that didn't work and was blessed by her sweet encouragement. Leanne knows what it's like to be so far away from friends and family as she and her family moved here from Australia about 8 months ago.

After I got to school, I got busy on setting up my room and was OK until in a quiet moment with another friend, the floodgates opened once again. This time, there was no holding back. Again, I was blessed. Jody prayed the sweetest prayer over me...I gave her permission to share with the team from UNOH and I know they'll also be lifting me up. They are mighty prayer warriors.

As I was leaving, I crossed paths with another friend, Anjie, who could tell something was up. Of course, the tears started again. After a quick hug from her, I was in the car and headed home all the time wishing for the privacy of driving my own car. My poor driver, Ton, had seen me upset earlier and now again. Well, once we got to the apartment, I realized I'd forgotten my backpack at the school. Wanting to help in any way, Ton offered to go back to school and get it. I let him go alone as I just needed space. By the way, earlier in the day, I'd realized that I'd also forgotten my cell phone in the apartment that morning.

Since I didn't have my key, nor my cell phone to call my friend Gini (she's a blessing everyday...in fact since she hadn't heard from me as we had planned, she was ready to contact Sam in Australia and organize a search party!), and not wanting to bother the office, I sat by the pond in the lobby. The only bad thing that happened there was I got a glass of water from the cooler and proceeded to pour it in my lap...don't ask me how, but this time I laughed. Not long after that, I crossed paths with Mindy. Mindy is from Utah and is mom to Jack (3) and Jane (2). I explained my key predicament and jokingly asked her if she knew the book, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. She was familiar with the story and also could relate to the day...she said she'd had plenty of them! Later in the evening, once I'd made it back into my apartment, Mindy delivered a plate full of warm cinnamon rolls....another sweet blessing!

The final blessing of the day came in the form of a text message from Ton at around 9:00. I'm not sure how he did this because up until now, my cell phone has only displayed Thai script. Anyway, he wrote of his concern for me and offered to do anything he could to help. As his English is very limited, I know he must have sought help or spent hours using a dictionary.

Reading back over the day, nothing really that bad or horrible had happened. The bottom line was that I was feeling lonely and vulnerable. As in the past, my first response was to withdraw and tough it out on my own. But yesterday, not wanting to let someone else down, I forced myself to try and rise above the feelings. Obviously, I failed. But it was in my failure that I was blessed. I think that's when God can do His best work...when we finally let our defenses down and say, "I can't do it." God answers with, "I can."

7 comments:

Terri said...

Tracey,

I'm so sorry you had such a bad day and were/are hurting, I am sending you @@@@@@@@HUGS@@@@@@@@@@
I'm so glad you were able to see the blessings in your otherwise bad day and that you allowed your new friends to bless you with their responses. Thinking of you and praying for you & yours.

<3 Terri

Lauren said...

I am so glad it seems you have so many new friends and people who care about you in Thailand. I know it's not the same as your dear, "old" friends, but at least you are not completely alone :) How nice to have hugs, prayers, text messages and warm cinnamon rolls! Love you~

The Mama said...

I hate hearing of your sadness/loneliness but am so glad you let some of your sweet new friends help you. God truly does bless us.

I've been catching up on the blogs since I made my road trip and I can't help but get teary-eyed.

I wrote more but realized it equaled a blog so I am moving it to my blog!

God is good and friends really can last forever.

Love you so much,
Daphne

David Michael said...

Tracey,

Oh my! Have you thought about getting a roommate? Are their any college or young professionals that are doing mission work that you could board?

We need to meet at Starbucks and talk!

Love,

David and Phyllis

Lauren said...

Tracey, I thought of you yesterday afternoon when I was watching our local news and they did a bit on Thailand at the very end. They were showing video of hundreds of lemur monkies outside a temple that were getting treated to fruit "buffet." Evidently it was a trial run for a future "buffet" that they will give in appreciation of the monkies. (?) Very strange! Anyway, it made me think of you and I wondered if you knew what they were talking about :)

Love ya,
Lauren :)

Lauren said...

I just realized I misspelled monkeys. I thought it looked funny when I typed it and then I asked Scott how to spell it. I never would have thought I would have misspelled the word "monkeys." Sorry! :)

Thailand Tracey said...

Lauren, Just for the record, my days have been much better since last Friday. Thanks so much for your kind thoughts and prayers. God is so good...all the time. I really need to write a new post.
As far as the monkeys- that's a new one for me, but not surprising. I'll have to keep a look out in the paper. 23 days and I'll be home! I know your mom is also counting the days until she gets to see you. Your family has such magical holidays to look forward to this year:) Enjoy!